Archive for May, 2009

Ol’ Blue Eyes

After Elliot was born a nurse who hadn’t yet met us walks into my room, looks at Elliot, looks at Peter and says, “Well, we know who daddy is.” At the time I was all “heh, yes my baby is as gorgeous as my husband.” Now that it’s almost six years later I like to retell the story more as “uhm, yes – the baby that was removed from the giant gash in my abdomen does have a striking resemblance to the man sitting over there.”

Peter’s mother tells a story that when he was little he could charm all the elderly church ladies out of their purse candy. He’d bat his long eyelashes and stare with a face that I assume looked a lot like this:

When Elliot was a toddler I took him to urgent care for what turned out to be another ear infection. He was as adorable as possible, chatting up the doctor. She looked right into his big blue eyes and said, “you are handsome.” Then she looked at me and said, “good luck.”

This son of mine? I think he’ll be a heart breaker. But of the quiet kind. I think he’ll be too busy presiding over Chess tournaments to notice girls. They’ll just have to suffer in silence. Swoon over those eye lashes of his. Write his name with swirlies and hearts on their notebooks. And if he really is like his dad, I don’t think he’ll have any idea.

Your Face Will Freeze Like That

Wrong in More Ways Than Six

Ah, Chris misses me. It was just enough to motivate me to hit the news sites and find something, anything to rant about. The Bristol Palin People cover? Nah. Too easy. How about this gem?

A group of sixth-graders made a YouTube video about how to kill a classmate. Sixth graders. Kill. A classmate.

I recall sixth grade, I was in elementary school. I think I had just muttered “fuck”. To highlight how amazingly naive I was, my seventh grade birthday celebration was at a skating rink. With roller skates. The kind with 4-wheels.

I digress.

In sixth grade I played with Barbies and my friends. And when we didn’t like someone? We so didn’t invite them to the slumber party. BURN. We did not think of not one, but six ways to kill them.

These little girls are well past being mean girls (follow that link, I double dog dare you – it doesn’t go where you expect!). They’re twelve years old and they’re openly discussing how to kill a classmate. One of the parents was too busy making dinner to pay attention to the victimized girl’s mother. Too busy? Do we, as a society, dismiss violent behavior when girls do it? Do we only worry about our boys? Or maybe I’m over wondering and we don’t generally pay attention?

I can guarantee you that if you called me and said that either of my children had been involved in the intimidation and threatening of your child – I’d be listening. I’d be shocked. And I’d most likely be in denial, but I’d be listening. Even if I had to set the Hamburger Helper aside.

If one of their neighborhood cats shows up shaved or set on fire these girls should be marked prime suspects.

Embedded video from CNN Video



And her rendition 18 months ago.

In the Mirror

Jump, Jump, Jump

And in case the musical reference isn’t smacking you in the face, go here.

No Photos

She thinks that “No paparazzi” only applies to papas, not mamas – phew

Radio Silence

Am going to test the theory that a picture is worth a thousand words. Probably for the remainder of the month. (And yes, I know that radio silence means no sound which would suggest no blogging – but it was a catchy title. )

Everybody’s Free

Summer started today. And since she’ll burn, we broke out the sunscreen

In this graduation season, here’s a little commencement speech for us all (and a reminder to wear sunscreen)

Boy & Dog

Next Page »